In November 2016 I shared my delight in finding the word Ubuntu. In closing that post I committed to explore (which I have) and share (which I did not) my findings. And while I feel compelled to explain myself and the progress of the past 50 (!) months, I won’t as the important step right now is the one forward. So here goes…
Hopefully together, safely distanced and masked up, we will start that next new page. And with this I hope to create interest, curiosity and inspire some dreaming. Ubuntu. I am because we are.
Why does ubuntu resonate with me?
…Perhaps because we are human, and connectedness is part of being human. Never has this been tested more than in the past year where physical distancing and intentional separation was thrust upon us with the pandemic. Even introverts are feeling drawn for more social interaction and gatherings, ambient noise from large gatherings and calendar commitments. These days there has been a little too much “I am” (alone) and not enough “we are” (together).
…Or perhaps, because we are social beings who fuel and feed each other with sharing thoughts, ideas, encouragement, challenges, cares, frustration which, in turn, stimulate self-reflection and often growth. So many of my best learnings are from observing others, discussing their motivations, and seeing the impact their behavior or actions have made. As a leader these observations and learnings influence my daily practices of what (and what not!) to do in critical areas, such as feedback, storytelling, casting vision and appreciation.
…Or perhaps, ubuntu is our responsibility to relate and inspire those people that fall into our “nest.” Whether it is your child or grandchild, a colleague or friend who seeks your counsel, a member of your service community, a neighbor, people are in your circle of influence and the care and interaction between you/them can offer help and encouragement on their journey. We have heard the adage that service is mutual, the giver “gets” much, often more than the sacrifice (whether it is time, acts of service, even money) they give. This is especially true when, instead of a transaction or exchange of goods, the gift is of oneself. I am because we are.
Ubuntu is a call to action, which we may not comprehend the price until much further down the road. I do not mean a financial price tag, I mean the price within the vulnerability to connect into “we.” The willingness to let someone into our bubble, where there is no relational distance. Are there boundaries? Yes. Do you get to choose what to expose and share? Yes. However, “we” is not planned out with detailed guidelines, roles and responsibilities. While structure can exist, our humanness requires it also to be organic. The “we” ebbs and flows, adapts over time, and things we admire about others surface, as does differences. Patterns will emerge, unimagined structure develops over time. The desire to control the framework and present only the best side of my story begin to melt away. “We” means I will also see myself differently at times, and the pieces of “I” that I don’t really care for or try to hide will also surface. Relating is vulnerable, as a true “we” has shared ownership, and we begin to show up authentically, keeping the tension of the give-and-take in balance.
Ubuntu requires belief and courage. Belief in the value of “we,” believing the vulnerability is worth the sacrifice. Belief in “I” and what is brought forward through your unique self is of value. We often equate the value with years of experience and may shy away if the transaction feels unbalanced (in our own view). The ubuntu call to action is about having the courage to bring your full self to the table, to believe in the predestined meeting, and authentically engage in the relating.
Picking up from November 2016, I am taking this first disciplined step to unpack my findings, and share the glory of ubuntu. This is terrifying for me and exhilarating at the same time. I cannot wait, and do not want to hit post. Call to action. Belief. Courage. I am because we are.